Monthly Archives: May 2009

Curiosity encouraged me to look up different words in place of ‘change’. Among these suggestions were: adjustment, conversion, development, distortion, innovation, modulation, mutation, reversal, shift, turnover, variance, and vicissitude.

What is striking about this list? There are words with opposing connotations to them, a negative or positive, depending on the way it is used. Mostly, however, the way a word is interpreted and given any form of directional content lies in the mindset of the one processing it. Adjustments can be good or bad. The same for conversions. A human being is constantly in some form of development, from the time of his or her birth to his or her death. Distortion is generally used in a detrimental way, such as one having a distorted sense of reality. Yet, it’s also a term used to denote the sound effects in musical instruments, like guitars. Innovation can be initially positive, but sometimes has a downside to its outcomes. Perhaps an invention that was meant to be used for the benefit of humanity is used against it, to wage war and violence. Alternatively, the presence of nuclear weapons may be dangerous, but many argue that it creates nations that can not only protect themselves, but by stalemating each other, peace is actually made possible and for longer periods of time.

I still have a nagging feeling that change does not have to fall into either category distinctly, like many things in life that I have over analyzed thus far. There are definite trends, sure, but suggestion is powerful. Being aware of one’s weaknesses by taking perspective from a different angle may uncover strengths, whereas paying attention to strengths can sometimes only serve to veil weaknesses. Awareness is painful. Change is not pleasant.

In life, change happens at varying speeds, sometimes through expected natural occurrences, and at times out of circumstances just beyond one’s control or vision. It’s a matter of how a person decides to receive the change at hand.

There was a recent layoff of someone dear to me, and it has affected me greatly. A few other things have led me to finally take the action of being part of two candidate pools of which I have a very good chance at being selected for both positions. They do not readily interfere with one another, and would provide me with greater financial security and general peace, even professional development. There are only mild constraints that can be worked through as details are shaped. Consequently though, my living arrangements are also entangled and bound to shift. I can only hope that I am making decent decisions and that the results from these choices and circumstances will only create a feeling of living authentically in the near future, and afford me the ability to provide for myself and attain my goals more easily. Nervous, but ready to stand and catch the next wave.

How do you perceive change? What is an example of something that has modified your actions, and how are you feeling about it?

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